Just a few weeks ago, explorers stumbled upon a group of 49 ancient and well hidden natural sinkholes in the Hanzhong area of Northwest China. Due to their isolation from the rest of the forest, most of the sinkholes contain rare and unusual creatures- including this real life Pikachu. The creature was observed jumping to unusual heights, interacting with other animals in a generally friendly way, and screeching “PIIIIIIIKAAAAAAACHUUUUUUU” while shooting lightning from its cheeks.
One of the explorers who discovered these sinkholes agreed to an EXCLUSIVE interview with the Fraghero team under the condition that he remain anonymous.
Fraghero: First of all, congratulations on your discovery! How does it feel to be the first to find something as incredible as this?
Explorer: Honestly, it’s all quite overwhelming- I’ve been getting calls from news agencies, movie executives and academics nonstop since I shared my find. The professors are particularly tenacious.
F: So how did you find these sinkholes?
E: Well, my regular route to work through the forest was blocked by a Snorlax and I didn’t have my Poké Flute so I had to find another way around. One thing led to another and BAM- I fell down a ledge I couldn’t see- and you know how hard it is to get back up ledges- and found myself in a huge sinkhole. I found my way out then came back later with more people to check it out. We ended up finding 48 more.
F: What do you think of the new animal you found in one of the sinkholes?
E: Well, it was really nice to see one that I didn’t have in my Dex for sure, I’d been on a bit of a dry spell to be honest. I’m not sure that Pikachu are supposed to be that color though. I might head back and catch one for the kids later today.
F: Isn’t that against conservation laws?
E: What?
F: Nevermind. Thank you for your time and congratulations again on your discovery, sir.
We tried to get one of the Pikachu to come in for a photo shoot, but after all 3 of our interns came back with visible electricity burns, we decided to give up on that idea.
This discovery blasts apart the common conception that Pokémon aren’t real and opens up even more questions. Are the developers of Pokémon gaining their inspiration from real creatures? How have they kept the secret for so long? What else is Japan hiding from us?
If the discovery of real Gundam robots comes to light soon, just remember: you heard it here first.
